"Happy" anniversary? Not for the Kash guys

This past Monday was the Kash guys 10 year anniversary party. As a loyal, yet outspoken, customer of the Kash guys I decided to attend. The deal was $12 to get in would get you food, cake, and free beer until it ran out. Not a bad deal, though I usually don't drink on Mondays - but as I said I decided to go. And boy am I glad I did!

Being the kickball dork that I am I got there right at six, figure a) it is a crime to not partake of as much "free" beer as possible whenever possible and b) it would be pretty packed at Kelly's Irish Times by 7:30 and at least this way I'd have a spot and food. I was right on about getting there early; it allowed me a good amount of food and I had no problems getting the early beers. I saw a few people I knew and said my hellos and noticed a couple of NAKID people in one of the corners. More on them later.

Who the Hell is tryin's to steal Curly's Koozies?

As 6 became 7 and then 8 something weird was happening - the bar remained, for the most part, barren. Not to the point of tumbleweeds rolling through, but they would have been welcome company. The Kash guys were all there walking around in their best dude ranch outfits - red WAKA button down shirts and blue jeans. It almost felt like I was watching city slickers seeing them. Then the designated "young" guy in the group was circling around looking like a skinny version of Hurley from Lost.

The Kash guys raffled off (for FREE!) 3 silver flasks and then the place cleared out like it was on fire. Some of the people who were there went downstairs for flip cup, the rest went home. I was one of the last ones standing, me and the NAKID people. So I walked over to talk to them.

I was told that immediately upon entering the bar the Kash guys recognized them and came rushing up to ask if they had paid to get in. When told they had, he seemed satisfied (shocking, isn't it, all the Kash guy cared about was that they had paid?). According to the story within a few more minutes another of the Kash guys came over to chit chat. Then, one of the NAKIDs went up to partake of some food and while she was walking back was accosted by a WAKA worker asking if she wanted a free koozie. Plates in both hands caused the NAKID player to pass, but the WAKA worker told her she could have one and placed it under the NAKID girl's armpit for safekeeping - which did not last long.

Safe again, thanks to the Kash guys!

Within a few moments the aforementioned city slicker who was checking on paid or unpaids scurried over and grabbed the precious koozie from under her arm. He scolded his worker, "These are for registered players only. SHE is not registered!" and walked away triumphantly with his koozie safely back in the box. Just so we are clear, he was willing to take the money to get in from NAKID players (who at one point DID play in his league), but didn't want to spare a 36 cent koozie to the filthy people. Seems petty and low class to me. I mean, what's the harm if she would have used the WAKA koozie at a NAKID event - it's free advertising retard! But then, this is typical of the Kash guys.

Umm, dude, why am I here? Where IS everyone?

Of equal importance in illustrating how the Kash guys roll was the turnout. I believe I am being generous in saying that 150 people were there. I don't mean all at once, I mean over the course of three hours. The bar was never full nor half full. In fact, when one of the WAKA worker bees was handing out cake he was soliciting a table of 50-somethings from Texas to buy a wristband so they could get the beer, cake, and food too! Hey, you know the Kash guys, the more (money) the better. Back to the numbers though, to understand how pathetic the turnout was the Kash guys claim to have 10,000 players in the DC area and 150 showed up for this HUGE anniversary party they have been pimping for over a month. From what I heard the Hurley guy came all the way down from somewhere in BFE NY, and for what?

I have to position this against the NAKID birthday party I was at in January to help explain why I think the Kash guys party was such a dismal failure. NAKID's one year party was on a Friday, free, and fun. The Kash guy's party was on a Monday, cost money, and was mundane. Having a party on a Monday to celebrate your 10 years is great for the bar, which is probably dead on Mondays, but not great for players. And why charge? Many of us have contributed hundreds of dollars over the years, couldn't they throw us a bone? I am sure the beer and food were donated so what was the cost to the Kash guys? Oh right - the vaunted koozies. More protected than out troop movements in Iraq.

Maybe the Kash guys should run the war. This was too easy to find, not like a koozie.

I guess my point here is this: it's just another example of the Kash guys suck and why other leagues have popped up here. If players were excited about WAKA they certainly would have come out - if the party was run properly. I don't know how many players NAKID had at that time, but it couldn't have been more than 500 or 600 and there were easily 300 or so at their birthday party.

If I was a Kash guy, I'd be worried. Their base of operations in Washington, DC and if the party on Monday was any indication that 10,000 could become 7 or 8,000 this year. And maybe 5,000 the next. Maybe once they start feeling it in the wallet they will listen to their customers. If not, they can always sell their koozies.