Prohibition lives!

Last night I was leaving the Mall area from seeing some kickball games and noticed a group of softballers congretated by some policeman. Then I noticed a cooler or something that read "Rolling Rock" and the familiar red Solo cups and knew this was bad. As I got closer I noticed the unmistakable smell of crappy beer and then heard one of the softballettes relaying on her phone, "I'm getting a citation". My first thought was: How can they be so dumb? Solo cups? Rolling Rock display? Were they BEGGING to get caught?

But then as I walked on to the Metro, I started to get mad.

What the heck is this crap with no alcohol on the Mall area? So I did a search and with the help of Sideshow Bob found this on the National Park Service's website:

Possession and consumption of alcoholic beverages is prohibited on the Washington Monument grounds. Alcohol is also prohibited in East and West Potomac Parks and on the National Mall, except within specifically designated concession areas which sell alcohol.

I'm sure the same line sticks out to you as it did for me: except within specifically designated concession areas which sell alcohol. Seems the National Park Service is willing to bend the rules as long as you are a concession guy willing to fork over a sum to the DC government to sell alcohol. Then on the little kiosks there is about a 5x5 area in which you must consume the purchased, overpriced beer. I wonder if the cans have Lojack in them to tell if someone walks away from the designated Gettin' Your Drink On Area. I can see it now, you step over the line and "Swarm, Swarm" is heard as Park Police tackle you.

My question is how is this right? I'm an adult, old enough to go fight in wars, old enough to get married, have babies, drink in a bar or in my home, drive a car, and do much more. Yet I can't bring a beer or 12 for my friends and me to consume while playing some kickball on the Mall? Of course I can, in between innings, go over to the government approved vendor drink them there and return to the game - because that's MUCH safer.

And it's not only the Mall, we found this for Rock Creek Park:

In 1953, Congressional legislation (67 Stat. 495) established a specific category for those park areas within the District of Columbia as National Capital Parks as opposed to National Parks or National Monuments. In making a separate category, Congress was verifying that the parks within the District of Columbia, including Rock Creek Park, have a particular mission to preserve not only the resources but also the character of the Nation's Capital.

Ok, let's take this one at a time. First, the law was made in 1953. Seems to me that many laws we had in 1953 were pretty bad and we changed those (ahem, Jim Crow), maybe we should take a look at this law too. Second, preserving the "character of the Nation's Capital"? PUH-LEEZE. This is the murder capital of the country and the mayor was caught ON TAPE smoking crack and was RE-ELECTED for goodness sake! I'm not asking for crack to legalized, just to drink a few beers during kickball. I think that's quite in line with the character of the Nation's Capital.

According to the CDC almost 55% of US adults had a drink in the last month. The number is much higher among kickballers. So just let us drink while we play; it makes the games more fun, we help the economy, and we promise to be good. Here's my letter to the powers that be:

To Whom It May Concern,

Let adults be free to drink on the National Mall. Most of us promise to take the Metro or other public transportation to go to the bar after games or to go home. Those of us that do not should be ticketed if our BAC is too high. We'll even buy the beer from your pre-approved vendors. Just give us the freedom.

Can I get a witness? Somebody say Amen.